Feeling and Thinking

Really demoralised now.

Really FEEL like saying that I want to change church just like that, counting so many push and pull (supposedly) things that are current.

But I refuse to base the decision on feelings.

Carrying on with reading the book 'Spirit of Truth', and have realised that a lot of my attitudes have degraded into misdirected objects of love, namely myself. Not only in terms of my brothers and sisters in church and school, but even my family, and those who don't profess to believe in Christ also.

Of course I can blame me being distracted probably and stuff like that, but in the end, it's still my acting out of my sinful nature.

Am in a big dilemma now, with a whole lot of grey areas around: I want to continue to learn, and grow, but should that be the reason that I change? We should be seeing how we can serve one another wherever we are, but isn't it "stupid" if we carry on in a situation where we definitely know that we'll fall back in the same pattern of past sinful living again?